ok i think i am slowly talking myself down, but still not moving forward in any real way. is that ok? ''do wot you can'' but am i just fooling myself. the paralysis is still here & in a lot of ways i feel like im back to square zero but i cant keep up the negative spiral. i know that shit is happening on the inside of me, and in some ways i am revelling in the tears - that have finally arrived, but is it wot i need?

oh did i tell you i took a pill?

i still have to think of a title for this post, i guess i have a while. and also focus on the wins i had today. i made my appointment, i made it out to coffee, i networked, i set up a good reads account...there were losses, but, well, theyre not poetic.