then.. then.. people are arseholes.

so i got sabotaged on the way to my happy place. bastard.

pretty painful, & i may write it out later, but aaahhhh!!!

& why did i let myself get sucked in?

anyway, this was not wot this blog was supposed to be. this blog is about finding my voice, finding my style, finding my place in the world. i want to kinda do stream of consciousness stuff & i want it to be gold. so here goes...

the influences of the greats now grate against my fibres and i cant seem to break free of the memories of other amazing lyrics & lines that we have already written. if nothing is original then why do i struggle? can we not see that although we are unique we just dont care?

well that was shit. here's summing i wrote on the bus today, getting closer...

i could take him
mr. right here
right now
i could setlle for less
than the best for once.
mostly i get nothing
so less is better,
yeah?

but i'd rather beat myself over the head with a crow bar.

i'm just not ready to give up the quest.

i've been reading them for years. i could keep reading for another million and still would not be done with everybody elses happy endings.

i say i have hope but do i?

in a fake it to make it scenario i'm just not that good an actor.