it's time to do some WORK.

ok wot we need is a bit of stream of consciousness. what we really need is a big dose of flow. but wot is gunna take me there? where is the spark?

so the pills that are stashed in a high up/out of the way place are not so out of the way that i cannot access them with ease. in fact they are so tantilisingly close that it is an active thing i am doing, not touching them. s'ok. but i need to point out that the pills that can take care of bizniz are just an arm reach away. now if i was to make that arm reach i would still have choices. yes, i said choices, plural. i could take 1, calm things down a little. i could take 2, calm things down a lot. or i could neck the bottle. calm hey?

ok, so i'm not lying but i am trying. and to that end i am staying here with my codependent friend and have plugged myself into sum binaural beats. i am not stretching and reaching, only in my mind. and i think we do need to give ourselves space, and more importantly, compassion to think these things. we should allow ourselves these thoughts but we should use them to motivate us to break thru. success is the ultimate revenge huh?

it's time to hit the white noise.